Friday, November 21, 2008

Running Scared

I have an 18-miler tomorrow morning. And I'm scared. I'm not quite sure why...

The thought of running for 3 1/2 hours in 20 degree temps?

Fear of pain...of my legs not wanting to go that far?

Fear of only having myself to "talk" to for that long? Seriously, running for 3 1/2 hours by yourself is a loooooong time.

All of these thoughts and fears are ridiculous. I've done 18 mile runs several times before. Heck, I just did 16 last weekend. I've completed two marathons. This kind of negative talk is what always holds me back...a complete lack of confidence in my abilities. But at the same time it's also what keeps me going. Pride in accomplishing the seemingly impossible (for me). If I wasn't just a little bit fearful, I'm not sure I would be motivated.

We'll see what tomorrow morning brings. I hope that I'm pleasantly surprised. After a few bad runs in a row, I'm definitely due for a good one. And I'll have 3 1/2 hours to contemplate my post-run treat...Ben & Jerry's? Oak Park bakery? Ferrara-Pan company store? Now THAT's what really motivates me. :)

- Her

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